Dewey

July 11

The first thought I had when I saw the name Dewey was the three nephews of Donald Duck's, Huey, Louie and Dewey. On the cover of the book that I was holding in my hand was not a picture of a duckling, it was of a cute and smart looking cat that went by the name Dewey Readmore Books.

He was named after Melvil Dewey, the inventor of the Dewey Decimal Classification, a proprietary system of library classification that organises subject categories corresponding to three-digit numerals, with further specification expressed by numerals following a decimal point.

The book was authored by Vicki Myron, the former director of the Spencer Library, Iowa USA. One cold January morning, Vicki found the then eigth-weeks' old Dewey in the library drop box just after she checked in for work.

It was to be the beginning of a intimate and endearing relationship that lasted 19 years, which ended with Vicki having made the hardest and most heartwrenching decision of putting Dewey to sleep as he was suffering was a stomach tumour that gave him nothig but pain.

For someone who is really not too fond of cats, i actually bought the book, and finished it within day. It wasn't a thick book. "Wow, it must be really captivating," Adrian remarked. He knew that when I read, I actually read. I do not browse or scan through, and for me to finish within a day, it had to be quite good given the fact that I attended to house chores in between. It normally takes me two days to a week plus to finish one, depending on the books and the contents.

One of the parts that I liked most in Dewey was when he discovered there was more on the world outside the library where he grew up in. When library patrons left the building, he was tempted to follow them out. One day, he attempted to do that three times and Vicki, being the protective mother, came out from her office and walked right up to the front door and reprimanded him in the sternest mother voice that I could imagine.

"You get back in here young man," and as soon as the words left her mouth, she saw a young man who had just left the building turned back and hurried into the library, took one of the magazines on the rack and buried his head into it. Dewey strolled in, and Vicki saw a smile on his face. I think it would have been more of a schmuck. I could imagine what an embarassing yet hilarious scene that was :) hehe.

My cousin, Calvin would love this book. He is a cat lover, much to my surprise when I first discovered it in the course of one of our catching up sessions. Hey Calvin, you want to borrow Dewey?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8nSg8oxrfA&NR=1

Visitors from Heaven

July 5

It is almost a month since Grandma's passing. Gone were the days that I would call home and speak to her and she would tell me about her health and updates from other family members. I get emotional whenever I think or speak of her and I can hear her voice in my head, especially the last conversation I had with her the night before she breathed her last.

Last night i dreamt of her, lying still before me. She moved when I held her hand in mine. "She's still alive, quick, get a doctor," I said. I woke up and the dream was interrupted. I felt the tears in my eyes. As I returned to sleep, I carried thoughts of her with me.

A week ago, I had a dream of my Grandpa who passed on almost 13 years ago. It was of him falling and I caught him in my arms. I felt my Grandma standing behind me as I held him but I could not see her face.

This year, I had several dreams of my grandparents and they were present in each of the dreams. Recalling them, I could not help wonder if it was a sign to me that the time had come for them to be reunited in the other world. I know they are now and I hope they are watching over me, like they had done.

Beloved Po Po

June 9

You cradled your first grandchild when she was brought home after spending 40 days in a glass. Lovingly and patiently you fed her, bathed her, changed her diapers, kept her safe and warm in your embrace every night; nurtured, taught and disciplined her with love, as you did your own children;

She remembers your soft, gentle hands that prepared her favourites dishes, makes her tasty kan shui chung (dumplings) and tong yuen (glutinous rice balls); that rub oitment on her upset tummy, braided her hair, and threaded her eyebrows. The same hands that spanked her when she misbehaved as a kid and that gave her blessings at the tea ceremony of her wedding;

Her fondest memories are the times she'd lie on your lap for comfort, and nestled in your bosoms for reassurance; your voice both her source of strength and guide;

You were the revered matriach who held the family together and were always larger than life, setting examples for your children and their children. You fulfilled your role as woman, wife, mother and grandmother with dignity, and took on life's challenges with great resilience, tenacity, perseverence and determination even in your last day;

You imparted in us great values and principles that you firmly upheld and virtues that each of us (most of the time) fall short of but strive to emulate; your big-heartedness and kindness through your words, deeds and thoughts touched many lives, and your quick-mindedness, tact and wisdom never failed to astound those that crossed path with you;

In the remaining years, you put up with a failing heart and a bad knee and you endured the pains and sufferings with head held high. Such steely was your will till you breathed your last in the arms of your loving daughter, on a morning cruise amidst scenic greens and mountains.

Po Po dearest, the pain of losing you and the grief in my heart are beyond words. A loss so great and deep that transcends understanding; I never told you this - I dreamt of your death many times and each time, I woke up with tears streaming down my cheeks. I never failed to ask God not to take you home till I am ready but I guess I'd never be ready. I had to let God do His will.

Po Po, I can never thank you enough for taking care of me, for your unconditional love. I was both your granddaughter and a late daughter. As you lie in peace, reunited with Kung Kung, may the good Lord bless you. Till we meet again one day, you are forever cherished and treasured in the heart of your granddaughter.

Ah...Goodness Me

April 28

The last few days had not been doing justice to my eyes. They were overused for copy checking of the entire annual report - 3 full drafts. Minus the covers, they have gone through 86 pages of text and numbers. 37 pages of financial statements and notes to the statements. I know some others had gone through far more pages than I did.

My empathy (and sympathy) go to those at the design agencies. The account manager that was assigned to my company annual report told me she went through the financials for three companies in one day. I am sure her vision and mind went bonkers. A total of almost 200 pages of numbers and notes! Suddenly 37 pages did not sound so bad after all. For a 86-page single language copy, it is probably considered moderately thick. The challenging part I would say was to single-handedly liaised with the various teams - outsourced company secretary, outsourced internal auditors, external auditors, directors, business units, outsourced share registrar, outsourced design agency and finance division to have all the inputs for the sections compiled and put together.

Thankfully I did not have to write the statements under the Corporate Governance section myself (and I don't know how either). And I had signed off the copy for print late evening at the design agency. Another 50% to go before the important day for a PLC - the AGM. Let's see, the venue has been booked and menu confirmed. The artwork for the Notice had been done and ready to be published on the scheduled date. Then there is the delivery of the printed books and circular to the bulk mailer (to shareholders), share registrar, company secretary and Bursa Malaysia, the AGM script for the Chairman, the AGM Q&A, and presentation slides. And after the AGM, printed books to the media and financial analysts and investment houses. Sigh, another month plus before my schedule is back to normal.

To Live or Not To Live

March 18

I texted my cousin Maggie, asking her for the date of the fifth session of chemotheraphy that my tai yee was to go for. Her replied came that it was scheduled for 23 March, and my tai yee was adamant not to go as she feared the nausea, vomitting, and fatigue that she'd have to endure thereafter.

With a heavy sigh, I told my hubby. A short moment of silence and he asked if it was true that when one is fighting for life, one choose to die, and when death knocks on the door, one chooses to live. What about those who made the decisions to take their own lives, and half way through the act, they decide to live?

I had my bouts of suicidal thoughts when I was a teenager, back in high school. Death seemed the easy way out from the so-called bigger than life problems for an adolescent, yet I lacked the courage see it through.

Over the years I realised that my faith was my saving grace. God gave each of us life, and life being a precious gift, should not be taken lightly, or for granted. While I might have thought that I did not have to face and deal with problems after dying, I forgot that the ones that live would have to bear the heartache and grief. It was a selfish act had I had taken my own life.

Life is never without problems and challenges, all sorts, all ways and almost every other day. But God is good, and if He allows these challenges in our lives, He would carry us through. He did not promise a rosy life, but giving us strength, grace and mercy when we seek Him. The will of God will never take us where the Grace of God will not protect us.

As much as we wished we could, we could never fully understand and feel the suffering and terrible discomforts that my aunt is going through during this trying period. No one can except those who have survived the treatment and disease. We help in whatever ways that we can; encourage her with words, giving physical support and help but only God can minister to her heart, give strength and courage to her mind and take her fears and restlessness away.

We pray for God's strength and courage for my aunt as she fights this challenge. God hears our prayers and understands her struggles and fears. He is a God that heals and we ask for His healing to begin in her and make her whole again.

If you are reading this, and you are one that believes in God and the power of miracle, please pray with us, for her.

Thank you and may the good Lord bless and keep you and family.

To be or Not to be

February 27-28

Adrian's office had moved to KL Sentral from Menara Keck Seng on Jalan Bukit Bintang as the space rental had shot up way too high since Pavillion KL came about across the busy road. He had to return to the new office to move boxes and unpack. Yes, he became coolie for the last two days together with some others. The whole exercise, in my humble opinion after hearing all the problems they had and came across in the new office, was extremely badly coordinated by the Admin & HR department.

While he was busy in office from morning 10am to night 8pm, I was busy with laundry, cleaning the house and mopping the floor, ironing, did gardening and prepare my own meals. The day before, we had a chat upon his return, and I asked how the all moving went. The movers had moved all the boxes from the old office to the new, but could not move them to the various departments and workstations respectively because the workstations were not fully set up. They had to move them to another area in the new office. Since the set up was only completed few hours later, the staffs had to move the boxes themselves to where the files and documents had to be kept, and since they did not complete the exercise that night, they had to return to office today to move the rest of the boxes and items.

My first thought was that someone should have gone to the new office to check on the progress of the workstation setup, and ensure that the place is ready for the movers and items, with designated areas labelled for ease and convenience.

He grabbed a few large black garbage bags from the storage cabinet, and I asked he had to bring garbage bags to office. The reply was that the item was missed out from the exercise checklist. Duh! of course they have to be made available. Anyone would have anticipated that there would be items to discard, even if they were just papers.

Perhaps it would have been a relatively easier task for one who has done such massive exercise and coordination. Perhaps the person-in-charge had not had the experience, hence overlooked all these smaller details. I guess this is what many mean by being having the actual experience and theoretical knowledge. In theory, the rest of items or factors are status quo while in real situation, there are many variables, and many contributing elements that could affect the plan and flow. Assumptions do not work. One cannot assume that the contractors would finsih the setup by the deadline set. One also cannot assume that everything would be packed into the boxes and be moved to the new place.

What's amazing of all was that only 20 percent of the entire workforce came in on Saturday to help and ensure the exercise was completed. So where is the team spirit? Where has the sense of resposnbility and ownership gone to? I didn't realise that the company belongs only to 20 percent of staffs.

Hold On Not....

February 22

The cheerful little girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five.Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, she saw them, a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box. Oh mommy please, Mommy. Can I have them?

Mommy,looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her little girl's upturned face. A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really want them,I'll think of some extra chores for you and in no time you can save enough money to buy them for yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."

As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and counted out 17pennies. After dinner, she did more than her share of chores and she went to the neighbour and asked Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.

On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace. Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and grown up.She wore them everywhere, Sunday school, kindergarten, even to bed.The only time she took them off was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green.

Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and come upstairs to read her a story. One night as he finished the story, he asked Jenny, Do you love me? "Oh yes, daddy. You know that I love you." Then give me your pearls. "Oh, daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess, the white horse from my collection, the one with the pink tail. Remember, daddy? The one you gave me. She's my very favorite."That's okay, Honey, daddy loves you. Good night." And he brushed her, Jenny's daddy asked again, Do you love me?" Daddy, you know I love you."Then give me your pearls." Oh Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have my baby doll. The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is beautiful and you can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper."And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.

A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed Indian style. As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one silent tear rolled down her cheek. What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?"Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl necklace.With a little quiver, she finally said, "Here, daddy, this is for you."

With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's daddy reached out with one hand to take the dime store necklace, and with the other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to Jenny. He had them all the time. He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so he could give her the genuine treasure.

So it is, with our Heavenly Father. He is waiting for us to give up the cheap things in our lives so that he can give us beautiful treasures. Isn't God good? Are you holding onto things that God wants you to let go of? Are you holding on to harmful or unnecessary partners, relationships, habits and activities that you have come so attached to that it seems impossible to let go? Sometimes it is so hard to see what is in the other hand but do believe this one thing God will never take away something without giving you something better in its place.

That's what we do sometimes, holding on to things that we deem precious. What are these compared to the treasures God has in stored for us in heaven?