Still in Our Midst?

September 11

I called Tai Yee up to ask if Grandma's spirit is lingering around. I was curious as I could still feel so.

"Yes, she is as the 100 days mourning is not over yet," Tai Yee said.

I then related to her the two dreams I had of Grandma for two consecutive nights. She appeared asking where all her supplements had gone and I non-chalantly answered her they were taken by my aunts. Shaking her head, she said "Must leave some for others, cannot take all".

The second night I saw her sitting on her favourite rest chair. She turned and asked me to give her shoulders a massage, which of course I was more than happy to oblige.

Relating these to my aunt and uncle, I mentioned that perhaps they should burn another paper doll. She was probably indicating that she wanted more pampering. Man, she did know how to ask :) without asking.

Dewey

July 11

The first thought I had when I saw the name Dewey was the three nephews of Donald Duck's, Huey, Louie and Dewey. On the cover of the book that I was holding in my hand was not a picture of a duckling, it was of a cute and smart looking cat that went by the name Dewey Readmore Books.

He was named after Melvil Dewey, the inventor of the Dewey Decimal Classification, a proprietary system of library classification that organises subject categories corresponding to three-digit numerals, with further specification expressed by numerals following a decimal point.

The book was authored by Vicki Myron, the former director of the Spencer Library, Iowa USA. One cold January morning, Vicki found the then eigth-weeks' old Dewey in the library drop box just after she checked in for work.

It was to be the beginning of a intimate and endearing relationship that lasted 19 years, which ended with Vicki having made the hardest and most heartwrenching decision of putting Dewey to sleep as he was suffering from a stomach tumour that gave him nothing but pain.

For someone who is really not too fond of cats, i actually bought the book, and finished it within day. It wasn't a thick book. "Wow, it must be really captivating," Adrian remarked. He knew that when I read, I actually read. I do not browse or scan through, and for me to finish within a day, it had to be quite good given the fact that I attended to house chores in between. It normally takes me two days to a week plus to finish one, depending on the books and the contents.

One of the parts that I liked most in Dewey was when he discovered there was more on the world outside the library where he grew up in. When library patrons left the building, he was tempted to follow them out. One day, he attempted that three times and Vicki, being the protective mother, came out from her office and walked right up to the front door and reprimanded him in the sternest mother voice that I could imagine.

"You get back in here young man," and as soon as the words left her mouth, she saw a young man who had just left the building turned back and hurried into the library, took one of the magazines on the rack and buried his head into it. Dewey strolled in, and Vicki saw a smile on his face. I think it would have been more of a schmuck. I could imagine what an embarassing yet hilarious scene that was :) hehe.

My cousin, Calvin would love this book. He is a cat lover, much to my surprise when I first discovered it in the course of one of our catching up sessions. Hey Calvin, you want to borrow Dewey?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8nSg8oxrfA&NR=1

Visitors from Heaven

July 5

It is almost a month since Grandma's passing. Gone were the days that I would call home and speak to her and she would tell me about her health and updates from other family members. I get emotional whenever I think or speak of her and I can hear her voice in my head, especially the last conversation I had with her the night before she breathed her last.

Last night i dreamt of her, lying still before me. She moved when I held her hand in mine. "She's still alive, quick, get a doctor," I said. I woke up and the dream was interrupted. I felt the tears in my eyes. As I returned to sleep, I carried thoughts of her with me.

A week ago, I had a dream of my Grandpa who passed on almost 13 years ago. It was of him falling and I caught him in my arms. I felt my Grandma standing behind me as I held him but I could not see her face.

This year, I had several dreams of my grandparents and they were present in each of the dreams. Recalling them, I could not help wonder if it was a sign to me that the time had come for them to be reunited in the other world. I know they are now and I hope they are watching over me, like they had done.

Beloved Po Po

June 9

You cradled your first grandchild when she was brought home after spending 40 days in a glass. Lovingly and patiently you fed her, bathed her, changed her diapers, kept her safe and warm in your embrace every night; nurtured, taught and disciplined her with love, as you did your own children;

She remembers your soft, gentle hands that prepared her favourites dishes, made her tasty kan shui chung (alkaline glutinous rice dumplings) and tong yuen (glutinous rice balls); that rubbed ointment on her upset tummy, braided her hair, and threaded her eyebrows. The same hands that spanked her when she misbehaved as a kid and that gave her blessings at the tea ceremony of her wedding;

Her fondest memories are the times she laid on your lap for comfort, and nestled in your bosoms for reassurance; your voice both her source of strength and guide;

You were the revered matriach who held the family together and were always larger than life, setting examples for your children and their children. You fulfilled your role as woman, wife, mother and grandmother with dignity, and took on life's challenges with great resilience, tenacity, perseverance and determination even in your last day;

You imparted in us great values and principles that you firmly upheld and virtues that each of us (most of the time) fall short of but strive to emulate; your bigheartedness and kindness through your words, deeds and thoughts touched many lives, and your quick-mindedness, tact and wisdom never failed to astound those that crossed path with you;

In your remaining years, you put up with a failing heart and a bad knee. You endured great discomforts and pains with grace and head held high. Steely was your will until you breathed your last in the arms of your loving daughter, on a morning cruise amidst scenic greens and mountains.

Po Po dearest, the pain of losing you and the grief in my heart are beyond words. A loss so great and deep that transcends understanding; I never told you this - I dreamt of your death many times and each time, I woke up with tears streaming down my cheeks. I never failed to ask God not to take you home till I am ready but I guess I'd never be ready. I had to let Him do His will.

Po Po, I can never thank you enough for taking care of me and for your unconditional love. I was both your granddaughter and a late daughter. You are now at peace, reunited with Kung Kung. Till we meet again one day, you are forever cherished and treasured in the heart of your granddaughter.

Ah...Goodness Me

April 28

The last few days had not been doing justice to my eyes. They were overused for copy checking of the entire annual report - 3 full drafts. Minus the covers, they have gone through 86 pages of text and numbers. 37 pages of financial statements and notes to the statements. I know some others had gone through far more pages than I did.

My empathy (and sympathy) go to those at the design agencies. The account manager that was assigned to my company annual report told me she went through the financials for three companies in one day. I am sure her vision and mind went bonkers. A total of almost 200 pages of numbers and notes! Suddenly 37 pages did not sound so bad after all. For a 86-page single language copy, it is probably considered moderately thick. The challenging part I would say was to single-handedly liaised with the various teams - outsourced company secretary, outsourced internal auditors, external auditors, directors, business units, outsourced share registrar, outsourced design agency and finance division to have all the inputs for the sections compiled and put together.

Thankfully I did not have to write the statements under the Corporate Governance section myself (and I don't know how either). And I had signed off the copy for print late evening at the design agency. Another 50% to go before the important day for a PLC - the AGM. Let's see, the venue has been booked and menu confirmed. The artwork for the Notice had been done and ready to be published on the scheduled date. Then there is the delivery of the printed books and circular to the bulk mailer (to shareholders), share registrar, company secretary and Bursa Malaysia, the AGM script for the Chairman, the AGM Q&A, and presentation slides. And after the AGM, printed books to the media and financial analysts and investment houses. Sigh, another month plus before my schedule is back to normal.

To Live or Not To Live

March 18

I texted my cousin Maggie, asking her for the date of the fifth session of chemotheraphy that my tai yee was to go for. Her replied came that it was scheduled for 23 March, and my tai yee was adamant not to go as she feared the nausea, vomitting, and fatigue that she'd have to endure thereafter.

With a heavy sigh, I told my hubby. A short moment of silence and he asked if it was true that when one is fighting for life, one choose to die, and when death knocks on the door, one chooses to live. What about those who made the decisions to take their own lives, and half way through the act, they decide to live?

I had my bouts of suicidal thoughts when I was a teenager, back in high school. Death seemed the easy way out from the so-called bigger than life problems for an adolescent, yet I lacked the courage see it through.

Over the years I realised that my faith was my saving grace. God gave each of us life, and life being a precious gift, should not be taken lightly, or for granted. While I might have thought that I did not have to face and deal with problems after dying, I forgot that the ones that live would have to bear the heartache and grief. It was a selfish act had I had taken my own life.

Life is never without problems and challenges, all sorts, all ways and almost every other day. But God is good, and if He allows these challenges in our lives, He would carry us through. He did not promise a rosy life, but giving us strength, grace and mercy when we seek Him. The will of God will never take us where the Grace of God will not protect us.

As much as we wished we could, we could never fully understand and feel the suffering and terrible discomforts that my aunt is going through during this trying period. No one can except those who have survived the treatment and disease. We help in whatever ways that we can; encourage her with words, giving physical support and help but only God can minister to her heart, give strength and courage to her mind and take her fears and restlessness away.

We pray for God's strength and courage for my aunt as she fights this challenge. God hears our prayers and understands her struggles and fears. He is a God that heals and we ask for His healing to begin in her and make her whole again.

If you are reading this, and you are one that believes in God and the power of miracle, please pray with us, for her.

Thank you and may the good Lord bless and keep you and family.

To be or Not to be

February 27-28

Adrian's office had moved to KL Sentral from Menara Keck Seng on Jalan Bukit Bintang as the space rental had shot up way too high since Pavillion KL came about across the busy road. He had to return to the new office to move boxes and unpack. Yes, he became coolie for the last two days together with some others. The whole exercise, in my humble opinion after hearing all the problems they had and came across in the new office, was extremely badly coordinated by the Admin & HR department.

While he was busy in office from morning 10am to night 8pm, I was busy with laundry, cleaning the house and mopping the floor, ironing, did gardening and prepare my own meals. The day before, we had a chat upon his return, and I asked how the all moving went. The movers had moved all the boxes from the old office to the new, but could not move them to the various departments and workstations respectively because the workstations were not fully set up. They had to move them to another area in the new office. Since the set up was only completed few hours later, the staffs had to move the boxes themselves to where the files and documents had to be kept, and since they did not complete the exercise that night, they had to return to office today to move the rest of the boxes and items.

My first thought was that someone should have gone to the new office to check on the progress of the workstation setup, and ensure that the place is ready for the movers and items, with designated areas labelled for ease and convenience.

He grabbed a few large black garbage bags from the storage cabinet, and I asked he had to bring garbage bags to office. The reply was that the item was missed out from the exercise checklist. Duh! of course they have to be made available. Anyone would have anticipated that there would be items to discard, even if they were just papers.

Perhaps it would have been a relatively easier task for one who has done such massive exercise and coordination. Perhaps the person-in-charge had not had the experience, hence overlooked all these smaller details. I guess this is what many mean by being having the actual experience and theoretical knowledge. In theory, the rest of items or factors are status quo while in real situation, there are many variables, and many contributing elements that could affect the plan and flow. Assumptions do not work. One cannot assume that the contractors would finsih the setup by the deadline set. One also cannot assume that everything would be packed into the boxes and be moved to the new place.

What's amazing of all was that only 20 percent of the entire workforce came in on Saturday to help and ensure the exercise was completed. So where is the team spirit? Where has the sense of resposnbility and ownership gone to? I didn't realise that the company belongs only to 20 percent of staffs.

Hold On Not....

February 22

The cheerful little girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five.Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, she saw them, a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box. Oh mommy please, Mommy. Can I have them?

Mommy,looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her little girl's upturned face. A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really want them,I'll think of some extra chores for you and in no time you can save enough money to buy them for yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."

As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and counted out 17pennies. After dinner, she did more than her share of chores and she went to the neighbour and asked Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.

On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace. Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and grown up.She wore them everywhere, Sunday school, kindergarten, even to bed.The only time she took them off was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green.

Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and come upstairs to read her a story. One night as he finished the story, he asked Jenny, Do you love me? "Oh yes, daddy. You know that I love you." Then give me your pearls. "Oh, daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess, the white horse from my collection, the one with the pink tail. Remember, daddy? The one you gave me. She's my very favorite."That's okay, Honey, daddy loves you. Good night." And he brushed her, Jenny's daddy asked again, Do you love me?" Daddy, you know I love you."Then give me your pearls." Oh Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have my baby doll. The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is beautiful and you can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper."And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.

A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed Indian style. As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one silent tear rolled down her cheek. What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?"Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl necklace.With a little quiver, she finally said, "Here, daddy, this is for you."

With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's daddy reached out with one hand to take the dime store necklace, and with the other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to Jenny. He had them all the time. He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so he could give her the genuine treasure.

So it is, with our Heavenly Father. He is waiting for us to give up the cheap things in our lives so that he can give us beautiful treasures. Isn't God good? Are you holding onto things that God wants you to let go of? Are you holding on to harmful or unnecessary partners, relationships, habits and activities that you have come so attached to that it seems impossible to let go? Sometimes it is so hard to see what is in the other hand but do believe this one thing God will never take away something without giving you something better in its place.

That's what we do sometimes, holding on to things that we deem precious. What are these compared to the treasures God has in stored for us in heaven?

Handbook?

February 20

A friend forwarded me a mail, which read life handbook 2009. I read, and have decided to have it placed as an entry because there ware so much truth in every line, every tip. Why then practise just in 2009? If the tips are beneficial and good, then they should be adopted every year, for many more great ones to come.

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time for prayer.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did the year before.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.


Personality:

11. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realise that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32. Do the right thing!
33. Always speak the truth even if it leads to your death.
34. GOD heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

May you find these as great reminders as I did.

St Valentine's Day

February 14

They called it a day of love :) a day of celebration in rememberance of martyred saints in ancient Rome. It is known as Feast of St Valentine, to remember the noble men revered by men, and whose acts known only to God. Along the way, it also became a day for lovers to express their adoration and love for one another, and in modern days has been overrated and commercialised.

Adrian was to return from his overseas project the same night, with his flight to touch down approximately 10.30pm. I wanted to surprise him with something he would need - a mobile phone - since his unit konked out and he was using my old Nokia.

I was in One Utama close to lunch time, and to my surprise, there were plenty of parking. After I got the SE phone, I was strolling around. Not many people but there were couples. Most of the ladies had a stalk of rose in their hands, with the other in the clutch of their other halves. As I was watching each couple, I felt a strange flow of sadness for them. I certainly hold no grudge against any couple or the day being a lovers' day. But is this day the only day to express one's love for another? If it is, then it is sad that expressing love and cherish has become an annual act. I guess in a way in making the purchase of the mobile phone, I too was no different from these couples caught up with the overrated celebration. I don't know about others. Adrian and I have the common understanding that we do not waste our money pampering each other just because it was Valentine's Day. Instead we agreed that we only buy a big gift once a year. You see, Valentine's Day, our birthdays and wedding anniversary are very close to each other. So instead of getting three different things, we each get the other one decent, useful and practical item. I guess we feel that the money spent would be a little more justifiable. Three occassion are probably good reasons to get something good and nice.

Topping that is probably our agreement that we don't do extravagent dinners that cost like RM200 / person on any of these days, especially Valentine's Day. Strictly no fresh bouquets, or teddy bears. We would just go to our favourite restaurants and have our favourite dishes on each other's birthdays. The bills, if possible, are to be less than RM100 for two. To us, we just want to have a good time, with good food in the company of each other. Perhaps some may say that we are overpractical, and least romantic and seem to have lost some excitement and surprise. Contrary to that, we actually have not :). To us, romance is just not about how much we spend, or how romantic dinners have been. It is how much sensitivity and attention given to the other in small ways, in the little things that we say and do daily.

I don't know about other ladies but I would rather have Adrian thinking of me when he passes a pastry stall, and buys me a nice piece of pastry that I'd like, or buys me a bottle of imported beer that I have not tried, or replenishes the supply of cammomile tea that I enjoy, or gets me a copy of my favourite comic, Baby Blues. Now that's Valentine's Day for me, every other day!

Quiet Start

January 29

I began work in office whilst Adrian was still on leave to finish up the painting job. The wet afternoons do not make it easy for the paint to dry.

Traffic in the morning whilst I was travelling to work was,needless to say, real smooth. If only it was so everyday. It was real bliss in office as it was less than 20% of the total workforce were present and I enjoyed the quiet and peace.

As years passed, I enjoy peace and quiet more and this is no exception for the environment at work. In reality, there's hardly any peace and quiet in office, especially in one that adopts the open concept. This is extremely challenging for a melancholic person as me. Since I am not at the level that I am entitled to have my own room in office, I usually stuff my ears with the earphones, even though I have no songs / music playing on my WMP. If I did, it'd be the six balinese tracks from album Bali Midori that I find soothing to my ears and mind. Sound of birds chirping, water running, and the alluring, celestial soothing scores of bamboo flute accompanied by soft rhythmic beats of the gong, and string instruments. These six tracks would be on repeat mode until I am done at work.

Dance and Crackers

January 27

Adrian continued with the rest of the walls and beams whilst I painted the other side of our gate and the grill of main entrance. After lunch when we resumed our task, we heard drumbeats and clanging cymbals. Lion dance performance at one of the houses further down the road. Needless to say, the performance would not be complete without the crackling of firecrackers. The dance ended as there was silence. Just as we thought we'd have some peace, the whole routine started again, and this time two houses away from the one earlier, and there was a third. It was more than 30 minutes when silence returned for good.

We stay in a quiet neighbourhood, and after a while, we (at least for me) grew to appreciate the peacefulness, and though sometimes could do with some liveliness, such loud chords could be, let's just say, a test to one's patience and tolerance. The again, it was CNY, and there were reasons for such boisterousness. What is CNY without lion dance and firecrackers?

Turning to Olive

January 26

I woke my hubby up for a quick breakfast. First day of CNY and we were to do what most (almost all actually) Chinese would think as taboo - painting! Out came the paint pan, brushes and rollers. We decided to go with olive green for outer walls of our house. Our rationale was simple, it'd help to camouflage the mildew that kept growing on them :)

We started work, and soon were getting the healthy morning sun in our face. The rays turned scorching hot when it was close to noon. Out came the straw hat and face towel. Whilst I was painting one side of the gate, an ice-cream seller came by and Adrian, being Adrian had to have ice cream. He hailed the ice-cream seller, and stood next to him like a school kid waiting for the two cones he ordered. "Tahun Baru you cat rumah ah?". Even the ice cream seller could not believe his eyes and just had to ask. "Kami tak pantang," was my reply.

By the time I finished one side of the gate, I got a wonderful tan :P and my husband had turned lobster red, so totally burnt. We moved to paint the parts of walls that were under shade. During the whole painting process, Adrian and I debated on the direction the rollers should go, and how the sides and corners should be done. Adrian being Adrian again just left the parts that needed more precise and careful strokes to his naggy wife. That was what he termed as preserving marital harmony :D and I agreed.

Familial Ties

January 25

This year we had a simple Chinese new Year reunion dinner with tai yee and family as she was not up to travelling back to Taiping to join the rest of family since she started on chemotherapy for breast cancer. Her next and third treatment was scheduled for the ninth day of Chinese New Year, and she would have another three more to go.

Adrian and I drove over with the three dishes I prepared. She insisted on preparing the soup and stewed mushrooms. We had a quiet dinner, during which she thanked us for spending the time with her and family, and for supporting her in various ways. We assured her that we would try out best to be as supportive as we could in any possible ways.

Privately as I ate my dinner, I replayed the words of my grandma who told me that my tai yee, when she was single and staying with my grandparents, had took care of me when I was a baby. Each morning she made sure diapers were laundered before she went to work. She helped to feed and care for me.

She took care of me when I first came to KL to work after my sixth form before I went on to pursue my tertiary studies. She took care of me when I was recuperating in her home from a surgery more than three years ago. She is more than an aunt. She is half mum to me. Her fight against breast cancer gave me heartache although I never expressed it much, well, perhaps my exasperation when she made excuses not to undergo the chemotherapy treatments.

But what made it worse is the fact that I am unable to prevent anxiety and depression spells that would ravage her mind, and the fear in her heart. I am unable to give her much in return for her generosity and kindness over the years except words, visits and buying her meal replacement supplies. Hard and mixed feelings that are difficult to be described; helplessness, exasperation, anger as to why she, with little education she received, having slogged her whole life for her family and children is inflicted with such dreaded disease. Yes, her golden years may have been prolonged thanks to early detection and treatments, but she should be enjoying herself, doing the things that she likes, spending time with her husband and friends.

Nowadays most of us are so caught up with our busy lifestyle and daily routines that most of us (or maybe it is just me) take family for granted. It only when we are about to loose them (or one of them) that we become more conscious how distance the relationships are, and we have taken for granted that they would always be with us.

Life is short, and everyday with family should be like the CNY reunion dinner, a time to come together for quality fellowship. It is heartwarming to see some families so closely knitted and spend every weekend together in some family activities. Some of us do not have the opportunity to have such closeness and warm relationships but that should not stop us from seeking and building one for ourselves, with future generations. It has to start somewhere.

Skin Off

January 24

We decided to give the exterior walls of our house a new coat of paint, and had decided to do the painting on the two days of CNY since we were hardly able to take long leave together to do something like that. We got the paints the weekend before, and decided to clean the mildew on the exterior walls, allowing time to dry before we paint them.

Adrian got himself up on the top of our house porch to clean off the mildew on the front outer upper walls of our two-storey house. After about an hour of cleaning, having moved in and out through our bedroom window few rounds, he was about done when the most unfortunate thing happened. The translucent PVC roofing sheet could hot hold the weight placed on the balancing foot and broke through. His right leg went down, up to his crotch.

I was in the kitchen preparing for our CNY dinner (we were having a reunion dinner with Dad a day earlier since we had planned to have a reunion dinner the next day with my tai yee and family at her place) when he came hobbling in. I thought he wanted to ask me something when he showed the bad scrap he got from his fall. Over four inches of skin on his shin was scrapped off, and there was a 's' shaped, couple of mm broad cut on his thigh.

My first reaction was to wash off the dirts on the raw wounds, and my poor hero grimaced in pain as the water ran down his leg. I felt my own face contorted as I felt a sharpness in my heart. I could not bear to see him in pain. Having seated him on the dining chair, I got our first aid kit. As I tore open a pack of alcohol swab, I told him it would hurt bad. I ran it gently over a smaller wound so that he was able to feel, and brace for the pain intensity. It ended up with him cleaning the wounds himself as it was easier for him to take his time to build his tolerance for pain. The next half hour was a session of flowery words as he cursed his pain away.

When his wounds were dressed, he continued with the cleaning downstairs with the electrical water jet. When I was done in the kitchen and had set the soup boiling on the stove, I joined him at the front of our house and took over the cleaning.

When we were done, I looked up the part of the PVC roofing sheet that Adrian broke through, and realised the cuts he got could have been far worse judging from the sharp edges of the hole. Indeed God is kind and we thank God that it was just skin that got scrapped off.

Filling Your Jar

January 15

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions - and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life."

''If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse or partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal."

"Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand. One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, "I'm glad you asked. The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend."

Lure of the Fist

January 10

Being a great fan of chinese martial art, I have watched old martial art movies by Jet Li many times over, and follow movies starring Donnie Yen. Only these movies are able to make me step into the cinema, and the last I was in cinema was for the movie Fearless (Fok Yun Kap) by Jet Li, on the life of the kung-fu master who taught at the famously known, Cheng Mo-Mun. That was more than two years ago.

When the trailer of the much-talked-and-reviewed-about movie Ip Man was available, and billboard posters started mushrooming in the Klang Valley, I was still unsure if I would catch the movie on screen. I read reviews on the movie, which came with high ratings and recommendations to watch. Adrian, being a real movie buff, talked about it earlier and I asked if he would like to catch it in cinema. Afraid of the coldness in the cinema, I asked which was the least cold - in KLCC, Pavillion or 1 Utama Shopping Centre. GSC 1 Utama was his recommendation.

We made reservations for two seats and I was all set, with my long denim jeans, and two extra jackets - one denim and one wool. The movie was to start at 12.20pm, and it was almost 12.50pm when the movie actually begun. Within the good whole 30 minutes of waiting and commercials I was getting cold, and I already had my denim jacket on. i covered my front and hid my hands under the wool jacket.

Ip Man was an engaging movie with few real good scenes in slo-mo, though I noticed some abruptness and missing links between few other scenes. When it ended, I glanced at my watch at and it was ten past two in the afternoon. I thought it was rather short for a martial art movie. Definitely some missing scenes.

Adrian asked what I thought of the movie since it was his second time watching it. He had caught it after work three days back. I had expected it to be more impressive given all the reviews I read. I thought the last fight scene with General Miura was too short, and angles were a little disappointing. They could have been a lot better. I also thought the ending could have been been done differently, unless the producer plan to have sequels later (that would be good for business).

Indeed there were missing scenes - four to be exact, as I discovered when I watched Ip Man all over again on DVD. Overall, casting was good. Simon Yum, versatile and talented actor, played his supporting role very well. Donnie Yen, who portrayed Ip Man, gave the late Wing Chun grandmaster his due, in character, and fighting style and prowness. That, I thought was admirable. I must admit, one does feel quite motivated to learn Wing Chun martial art after watching the movie. Well done, Donnie!